November 2021

Gratitude and Light by Michaela Frydman

As we approach the end of the year 2021, it’s natural to look back and reflect upon all that has happened to us in the past year. It’s sometimes felt like a pretty rushed year, especially with Chanukah coming so soon after Thanksgiving. What can we learn from these two holidays, one Jewish and one secular?

Thanksgiving can feel like an easy holiday to sum up since so much of the focus is on expressing gratitude. A lot of focus is on things that we are grateful for, such as good health (if we have it), having a roof over our head (if we have that too) or having enough food to sustain us. There are so many things we can be grateful for, and we can even be grateful for the practice of gratitude.

Research has shown that mindfully practicing gratitude can benefit our mental health. In one study done by psychologists Dr. Robert A. Emmons of the University of California, Davis, and Dr. Michael E. McCullough of the University of Miami, they asked all participants to write a few sentences each week, focusing on particular topics. After 10 weeks, those who wrote about gratitude were more optimistic about their lives and had experienced fewer visits to physicians than others in the study who had written about neutral or negative topics.

While not necessarily scientific, there has also been generations of research done on the practice of gratitude and how to develop it in ourselves in the Jewish practice of mussar. In his book Everyday Holiness, The Jewish Spiritual Path of Mussar, Alan Morinis writes “The Hebrew term for gratitude is hakarat ha’tov, which means, literally, “recognizing the good.” The good is already there. Practicing gratitude means being fully aware of the good that is already yours.” Recognizing the good that is already ours can be a challenge when we are facing life’s hardships, but the good news is that gratitude is a practice. It does not have to be perfect; it just has to be attempted mindfully. Tips on how to cultivate gratitude according to Harvard Health Publishing article,
“Giving Thanks Can Make You Happier.”

Write a thank-you note. You can make yourself happier and nurture your relationship with another person by writing a thank-you letter or email expressing your enjoyment and appreciation of that person’s impact on your life. Send it, or better yet, deliver and read it in person if possible. Make a habit of sending at least one gratitude letter a month. Once in a while, write one to yourself.

Thank someone mentally. No time to write? It may help just to think about someone who has done something nice for you, and mentally thank the individual.

Keep a gratitude journal. Make it a habit to write down or share with a loved one thoughts about the gifts you’ve received each day.

Count your blessings. Pick a time every week to sit down and write about your blessings — reflecting on what went right or what you are grateful for. Sometimes it helps to pick a number — such as three to five things — that you will identify
each week. As you write, be specific and think about the sensations you felt when something good happened to you.

Pray. People who are religious can use prayer to cultivate gratitude.

Meditate. Mindfulness meditation involves focusing on the present moment without judgment. Although people often focus on a word or phrase (such as “peace”), it is also possible to focus on what you’re grateful for (the warmth of the
sun, a pleasant sound, etc.).

While Thanksgiving teaches us about gratitude, Chanukah teaches us to celebrate light during the darkest months of the year. In modern times, it’s sometimes easy to take light for granted, especially when we can just flick a switch and have it on in a matter of seconds. In many ways, we are inundated with lights, headlights on our evening commutes, streetlights to help us walk at night, and light from electronic devices such as TVs, computers, and cellphones. Make a point of taking the time during our festival of lights to bask in the warmth of the candle lights and save the light from your devices until the morning. Happy Chanukah everyone!